Regeneration

It's funny - when I don't blog every day or so and let too much time pass, it's so hard to get started again. I don't seem to know where to start and so I don't.

Anyway, I'm going to start again and I think I'm going to do what I did at this time last year - blog a short post every day, writing what I've done for a work out. That will make me more accountable to get it done. I have big goals for next year but somehow, I don't seem to have the wherewithal to get it done right now. I procrastinate when I get home from work, and the next thing you know, I'm tired and it's too late to work out.

That's not to say I've been doing nothing - I have been running. Funny how I love running so much that it's never something I have to get up the motivation to do. I don't know why I love it - by all estimations, I should hate it - I'm not even any good at it - but still I persevere.

Fall and Early Winter

Going back to school signals the end of the triathlon season for me. This year, it was extended long enough for me to do the Victoria Half Marathon, however marginally, and with any luck next year, I will do the Okanagan Marathon in the same October weekend. But other than that, I seem to lose interest in triathlon training in the fall as my life shifts back to a focus on school and my body decides it needs a break. I don't want my body to take a break - I want to keep on doing some form of exercise at least five days a week, even if it's something completely different from swim/bike/run, but it just doesn't seem to happen. I don't seem to be able to figure out how to equalize my training enthusiasm so that it stays steady for a whole year. I know it's normal to need a few weeks off now and again but I find that once I take a break, I have a hard time getting back into serious training. Right now, it just seems like a relief that I don't have to swim, and the thought of heading down to the "Triathlon" room to ride the trainer seems daunting. And so I run.

Physiotherapist

After the season was over, I met my physio therapist at the gym and he tested my strengths and weaknesses. Not surprisingly, my quads and calves are strong and my glutes and hamstrings are weak. In addition, I need to strengthen my core and abs so I don't have lower back pain caused by my spondylolisthesis. Roy created a strength workout with a focus on legs and core and suggested I do it twice a week. I'm able to do the workout at the gym using machines, and at home using my ball and bands and I've tried (but not hard enough) to do it twice a week as he suggested. My goal for December is to stick to that plan.

At first, the lunges and steps were killing my legs and I could barely walk for 1-2 days after the workout so that was affecting my running. I went back to doing the workout with body weight only and that helped a lot. I think I'm ready to add back the hand weights so today I used small 3 lb weights. We'll see how I feel tomorrow. I've decided to go on a 3 day schedule and repeat it - run, weights, trainer ride. That will give me a day's rest after my weight training so it doesn't affect my run.

Diet and Weight

I am not eating as well as I could. I'm not doing badly - my breakfast, lunch and daytime snacks are good and I am drinking lots of water. I've been making regular dinners for the boys and eating smaller portions of dinner but I have also freely been eating junk when it's there. Someone brings treats to work, I eat some. If there are cookies or chips in the house, I indulge. This adds something in the neighbourhood of 300-500 extra calories per day that I do not need. Couple that with less training and you can see where this is leading.

I have gained five lbs since the summer. Well actually, I gained two pounds during the summer and another three this fall. If I eat what I feel like, I could easily gain twenty pounds in a year. It's a constant battle. Normally I don't let myself gain more than three pounds before I cut back calories but this time I managed to let five pounds slip on before I noticed. And now I have Christmas staring me in the face. My goal will have to be to maintain my current weight for the month of December and then get back on track in January. It'll take me 3-4 months to lose the weight that I could easily gain in a month. Being female sucks sometimes.

Dad

My dad died 35 years ago today, December 5, 1975. He was killed when a rotten log broke off and hit him where he was running the saw at Eburne Sawmill in Vancouver, BC. I am still sad when I think about it. Sad and angry. He went to work one day and just never came home. I was 15.

I did talk to him on the phone that afternoon. I was learning to play guitar and I had learned a new song. My Dad called home to chat with my Mom while he was on his dinner break and I insisted that she hold the phone to my guitar so I could play the song for him over the phone. I knew that it couldn't wait until the next day.

That night I was cheerleading at a basketball game at school. Near the end of the game, my best friend saw my Dad standing across the gym watching the game and pointed him out. He was wearing his blue work clothes and carrying his lunch kit. I figured the mill had broken down and he had come home early, stopping by the school on his way home. Our team scored a point and we jumped back into action and when I looked back, he was gone. My friend and I were both surprised that he wasn't there any more but we decided that it must have been someone else.

An hour later, back at home, the police came to tell us that Dad had been killed. The time of the accident was about the same time that we had seen him at the school. I don't know what I believe, but maybe he came to say goodbye. I think Dad hung around for a few weeks after he died. There were several other strange happenings. Yes, I suppose they are just weird coincidences but it helped my 15 year old mind to think he was close by.

Losing my Dad at that age really screwed me up for a few years. I made a lot of bad decisions, I made my mom's life harder than it already was. She had four teenagers and I was doing nothing to set a good example for my younger siblings. Somehow, I managed to turn my life around and do some good but it was a hard struggle.

Anyway, I guess I just want to say that if you have kids - take care of yourself. Be safe. Don't take risks. Be healthy. Your kids need you.

I still miss you Dad and I love you very much. I hope you are proud of the way I turned out.